Thursday, January 31, 2008

Love is...

Staying in contact over 11 years, even though we had never met.
We had the privilege of meeting Noah's biological grandparents for the first time this past Thursday night.
Communicating through letters and gifts, Tom and Beverly have been more than generous and kind, persevering for years in spite of the closed doors of Noah's adoption. Now that the door is ajar, we have begun communicating more regularly with the ease of the internet.
I would like to say two things about this family: First of all, meeting Tom and Beverly confirmed my sentiments...they are lovely people. Secondly, I wish we had meet years ago. (Open adoption was not legalized through NC adoption agencies until 2002, six years after Noah was born.)
Noah told us after we left, that although he was hesitant beforehand, he was glad he had the opportunity to meet both of them. (Especially when he found out they are avid Panthers fans!)

Tom and Beverly, thank you for taking us out to dinner last week. It truly was a joy to be with you both. We love you guys, and thank you again for staying in touch.
Tom, Noah has considered your regard for David Garrard, and is now a Jaguars' fan as well. ; )

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

CJ has a Blog!

Due to a mass number of requests, CJ Mahaney
(Sovereign Grace Ministries) has finally acquiesced and
will join the rest of us here in Cyberland. His purpose?
Read for yourself:
"So here would be my hope for this blog, and for the handful of you that will join my family in reading it. If I can somehow draw your attention each week to the hill called Calvary and remind you of the Savior’s substitutionary sacrifice on the cross for our sins, if I can draw your attention away from yourself and direct your affections to him, then this blog will have served your soul and made some small difference for the glory of God. I pray it does."

Hope you'll join me in visiting this sure-to-be means of grace available to us all!
Go there!

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Emotions and Adoption

It's not uncommon for people to approach me and John about adoption. Recently, it seems there has been a steady stream
of adoption-seekers, wanting counsel/advice/prayer. This week, we received an email about a young pregnant woman in need of
a place to stay until her baby is born (she is making an adoption plan). Today at church an adoptive mother shared about her pregnant niece, and asked for prayer as they pursue adopting
the babies (twins).
In March, John and I will participate in the Adoption Informational meeting at church. I often wonder how God wants to use us in this regards, how would He have us to serve? Is it to promote open-adoption in a closed-adoption-minded society? Is it to merely help people through the process of adoption: the technicalities, finances, emotions? Is it to sympathize with those families who have relinquished children for adoption, still feeling the effects of their loss years later? Or is it to empathize with those facing the heartache of infertility, longing to have a child? How can we serve?
Whenever I talk with a potential adoptive parent, I think about the difficulties associated with adoption...the emotions that occur behind the scenes with closed adoptions (or international adoptions), or perhaps the emotions that confront the parents in the case of domestic infant adoption, as it has us. On an open adoption blog I frequent, I read this quote written by an adoptive father and author, Dan Savage:
"I was 33 when we adopted DJ, and I thought I knew what a broken heart looked like, how it felt, but I didn't know anything. You know what a broken heart looks like? Like a sobbing teenager handing over a two-day-old infant she can't take care of to a couple she hopes can."

From the same blog, a waiting adoptive mother posted: "As the due date approaches, everything seems to grow larger. Forgive the lame image, but imagine all the emotions of adopting as soap bubbles. Until recently, they were wee little bubbles on my mental landscape. One would float up from the depths of my heart, dance around in the breeze and occupy my attention for awhile, then--pop--it would be gone. A bubble of excitement here, a bubble of concern there. But now the bubbles are larger and more frequent. They hang longer in the air, jostling with each other for space. As my joy at the prospect of another child grows, so does my heartache for Ms B*. There are bubbles of affection for Ms B*, bubbles of anger at her circumstances, bubbles of frustration at ethical obstacles, bubbles of gratefulness for the support we each have, bubbles of love for Baby B*, bubbles of sadness for us all."
Wow. I can relate with that one. Funny how those bubbles still linger, even years after the adoption takes place.

*Ms B is pregnant, and has chosen the blog author to adopt her baby. 
Baby B is the baby.

Friday, January 25, 2008

Friday Friend Highlight

John and I have recently been discussing what a wonderful servant my friend, Lindsay Gibson, is. I've been wanting to honor Lindsay on here for the last several weeks.

Lindsay, I remember several years ago, Jen Patterson raved about what a wonderful woman of God you are. She specifically mentioned your love for the Word of God; how much you enjoy reading godly publications; and how easy it is to fellowship with you. I couldn't agree more. I believe the fruit of fellowship is a result of the time you spend/have spent soaking in Truth. I am grateful to be a recipient of that fellowship, and for the blessing it is to be your friend.
Your humility is another characteristic that is evident in your life. Your recent blog series, focusing on the sin of anger, was filled with humble examples. There have been numerous times you have shared your struggles with me and asked for counsel. You are quick to confess sin and specific when sharing your heart. You also pursue relationships with older women for accountability and wisdom, a perfect Titus 2 example. It should be no surprise for us to observe so much fruit in your life, as God rewards the humble with grace.
Opening your life up to others, has no doubt won you many friendships. I recently mentioned to John I don't know of anybody who has as many close relationships as you do. I know if I read all of the scrapbook entries from your birthday, I would be nodding my head in agreement with all of them. You are a grand friend to have indeed.
One of the greatest kindnesses you have displayed to your friends is in your gift of service. The night Mickey appealed to the church about caring for the pastors' families with young children, you immediately offered babysitting for our caregroups... willing to take them all, in addition to your own two children. So I took you to task by asking you to watch my girls while John and I had a night away with the Freases. Your resounding "yes" blessed me, not only because I knew the girls would be well-cared for, but also because they would be enjoyed. : ) (When I picked up my girls on Tuesday, you were caring for the Balts's daughter as well. It literally was a Girl Party!)
It really was no surprise as I saw you join hands with Laura Hutchinson to bless the Childress family with meals and updates in the middle of their crises. You have been a true friend to Lori. Just weeks later, the Balts's twins were prematurely born, and once again I saw your emails circulating: updates, meals, shower... Even more profound, you do these things in the midst of your own physical challenges. Battling migraines each week, juggling doctor appointments, trying new medications and dietary restrictions do not stop you from laying down your life for your friends.

Lastly, you are a lot of fun to be around! Whether it is late night scrapbooking; an overnight shopping spree with a group of us; or chatting about beads, blogs and babies, I love spending time with you.
Thank you so much for your example, Lindsay.
For those of you who want to see how cute our girls are together, here's a short slideshow:

Thursday, January 24, 2008

VanLandingham


Frolicked around town this week with the Freases. Doug and Kristin joined us for a fancy dinner at Sullivans and an overnight stay at the prestigious VanLandingham Estate in downtown Charlotte. We had a marvelous time.
Thank you, Lucases and Gibsons, for caring for our children. (They had a great time, too!)

Friday, January 18, 2008

Puzzled


Isn't she smart?! : )

Thursday, January 17, 2008

It's Snowing!


Wednesday, January 16, 2008

15 Years!


I love you, John! Happy Anniversary!

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Gotta Love It

Friday, January 11, 2008

God Incarnate

In light of the recent Christmas celebrations,
I came across a rather lengthy, yet favorite quote
by J.I. Packer:
"It is no wonder that thoughtful people find the gospel of Jesus Christ hard to believe, for the realities with which it deals pass our understanding. But it is sad that so many make faith harder than it need be, by finding difficulties in the wrong places.
Take the atonement, for instance. Many feel difficulty there. How, they ask, can we believe that the death of Jesus of Nazareth–one man, expiring on a Roman gibbet–put away a world's sins? How can that death have any bearing on God's forgiveness of our sins today?
Or take the resurrection, which seems to many a stumbling block. How, they ask, can we believe that Jesus rose physically from the dead? Granted, it is hard to deny that the tomb was empty–but surely the difficulty of believing that Jesus emerged from it into unending bodily life is even greater? Is not any form of the theory of temporary resuscitation after a faint, or of the stealing of the body, easier to credit than the Christian doctrine of the resurrection?
Or again, take the virgin birth, which has been widely denied among protestants in this century. How, people ask, can one possibly believe in such a biological anomaly?
Or take the Gospel miracles; many find a source of difficulty here. Granted, they say, that Jesus healed (it is hard, on the evidence, to doubt that he did, and in any case history has known other healers); how can one believe that he walked on the water, or fed the five thousand, or raised the dead? Stories like that are surely quite incredible. With these and similar problems many minds on the fringes of faith are deeply perplexed today.
But in fact the real difficulty, the supreme mystery with which the gospel confronts us, does not lie here at all. It lies not in the Good Friday message of atonement, nor in the Easter message of resurrection, but in the Christmas message of Incarnation. The really staggering Christian claim is that Jesus of Nazareth was God made man–that the second person of the Godhead became the "second man" (1 Cor. 12:47), determining human destiny, the second representative head of the race, and that he took humanity without loss of deity, so that Jesus of Nazareth was as truly and fully divine as he was human.
Here are two mysteries for the price of one–the plurality of persons within the unity of God, and the union of Godhead and manhood in the person of Jesus. It is here, in the thing that happened at the first Christmas, that the profoundest and most unfathomable depths of the Christian revelation lie. "The Word became flesh" (Jn 1:14); God became man; the divine Son became a Jew; the Almighty appeared on earth as a helpless human baby, unable to do more than lie and stare and wriggle and make noises, needing to be fed and changed and taught to talk like any other child. And there was no illusion or deception in this: the babyhood of the Son of God was a reality. The more you think about it, the more staggering it gets. Nothing in fiction is so fantastic as is this truth of the Incarnation.
This is the real stumbling block in Christianity. It is here that Jews, Muslims, Unitarians, Jehovah's Witnesses, and many of those who feel the difficulties concerning the virgin birth, the miracles, the atonement, and the resurrection have come to grief. It is from misbelief, or at least inadequate belief, about the Incarnation that difficulties at other points in the gospel story usually spring. But once the Incarnation is grasped as a reality, these other difficulties dissolve.
If Jesus had been no more than a very remarkable, godly man, the difficulties in believing what the New Testament tells us about his life and work would be truly mountainous. But if Jesus was the same person as the eternal Word, the Father's agent in creation, "through whom also he made the worlds" (Heb 1:2), it is no wonder if fresh acts of creative power marked his coming into this world, and his life in it, and his exit from it. It is not strange that he, the Author of life, should rise from the dead. If he was truly God the Son, it is much more startling that he should die than that he should rise again.
"'Tis mystery all! The Immortal dies," wrote Wesley; but there is no comparable mystery in the Immortal's resurrection. And if the immortal Son of God did really submit to taste death, it is not strange that such a death should have saving significance for a doomed race. Once we grant that Jesus was divine, it becomes unreasonable to find difficulty in any of this; it is all of a piece and hangs together completely. The Incarnation is in itself an unfathomable mystery, but it makes sense of everything else that the New Testament contains."

Monday, January 7, 2008

God as Father: Understanding the Doctrine of Adoption

Whether you download this sermon, or listen to it on my blog, please take time to hear this message.

12/23/07 CJ Mahaney, Covenant Life Church, Gaithersburg, MD

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

Happy Birthday to Spence

With every New Year
comes the celebration of
our sweet gift from the
Lord, Spencer James.
A millennium baby, Spencer was born eight years ago on January 1, 2000. He has been an energetic and radiantly happy child. His cheerful disposition characterizing him since infancy, Spencer began consistently smiling at the young age of three weeks. He delights in making others happy as well. Even tonight we had a houseful of children having supper with us and Spence had them all cracking up. In videos you will notice Spencer making Lauren laugh, as the one below. This is not an uncommon scene:

Spencer also has a very tender heart. He regularly admits his faults when he has done something wrong and asks for forgiveness. Often sympathetic, he notices the emotions of others, and tries to make things better if someone is sad. 
Spencer is sincere and enthusiastic about the slightest kindness. At his birthday party this week, his wholehearted "thanks" were made clear after each gift was opened. He is recurrently grateful without being prompted.
It's hard to believe eight years have flown by so quickly. I distinctly remember Spencer sleeping in my arms the night he was born, and the joy on my Mother's face when we drove by her house to surprise her with our new little one. It seems just yesterday he was pulling out his little "gunnies and fights" (guns and swords) trying to keep up with his big brother, and sleeping with his cowboy hat on. He no-longer calls skeletons "bone-mannies", nor does he refer to my Mom as "Mrs. Grandma". No, my little boy is definitely growing up, and what a delightful "young man" he has become.
We love you, Spencer and hope you have a wonderful eighth year. You bring much joy to those around you, and are a delight to our souls. Happy birthday, buddy.